The clock ticked non-stop, day in and day out, both in the new moon and full moon, and as the day broke and dawned. I was alone, seeing each day passing by, and the cloud of the night wearing its seasonal look from time to time. There I kept muttering behind the blind in the lone silence of my room, “All men are the same.”
As the sun fell behind the horizon, I looked out through the window in my well-furnished kitchen, only to discover the sky as fiery as flame. Another night was fast approaching, when every creature would find pleasure in rest. So I leaned on the kitchen sink. My arms were paralysed by the pictures scrolling through my mind, as my eyes were fixated on the glaring sun. Little did I know I had let out the tears threatening my eyeballs; I could hear a plop as the tears dropped into the kitchen sink. Still, the tears could hardly distract me from gazing at the sun.
Truly, I was rich and well-educated, but that was not the be-all and end-all of my life; neither was my engagement, as a dedicated entrepreneur, able to override my singleness. As my habit, I would crash into my empty bed out of concern that the sun might set without any pollen to pollinate the flowers in my garden. Thereafter, the alarm clock would awaken me to the wrong side of the bed due to my preoccupations. This was my inconsistent lifestyle, which I desired to change.
Now, all I needed was someone to reflect with me when I was deep in thought, to celebrate with me when I was successful, console me when I was depressed, satisfy my emotional longings, and make me feel complete as the society demanded. Sadly, though, there was no one to fill the gap. Still, I turned to the clock maybe it would halt for a while, but it kept ticking every bit of time because it was a friend to no man.
Now, all I needed was someone to reflect with me when I was deep in thought, to celebrate with me when I was successful, console me when I was depressed, satisfy my emotional longings, and make me feel complete as the society demanded.
All these were motives that could lead a sane woman to the captivity of a psychopath. I was also a victim of such relationship, in which I concluded the end would justify the means. As days passed, I turned a puppet in the hands of love; little did I know the jack was a fortune hunter. In fact, it was not until I swam in the pool of tears did I realise that my wealth was everything but a license to marriage. Thereafter, I forged ahead to adjusting my lifestyle to a greater extent maybe that could attract the right man to me. The greatest adjustment unfolded on my relocation to a street meant for the populace.
Having abandoned my luxury and relocated to a new street, finding and making myself available for potential wooers consumed my other priorities. Just as a miner explores the jewel of the land, I was looking out for the right man almost every day, especially at wedding parties and other social functions where I could easily meet responsible men. For several weeks, I leaped out for trial again and again with the hope that my trial and error would yield a positive outcome someday. But still, I had to accommodate my singleness as no one seemed to notice me among the throng of attendees. So my concerns, anxieties and depression escalated as days passed.
For several weeks, I leaped out for trial again and again with the hope that my trial and error would yield a positive outcome someday. But still, I had to accommodate my singleness as no one seemed to notice me among the throng of attendees.
Soon, another day broke after a chilly night; it was a Saturday on my to-do list. At eleven o’clock in the morning, I stepped out on high-heeled shoes and a sleeveless sheath dress; then I boarded a taxi to the venue of a wedding party where men were a battalion. On getting there, I sat at the table close to the exit of the event hall. Expectant and purposeful, my eyes roved about until I caught sight of some presentable men who were dressed in local attires. Though I could not judge a book by its cover, I was hopeful that the right man could be anywhere among those presentable men. Optimism crept into my heart having chosen a seat that was positioned out of the focus of the crowd. It was a perfect place to accommodate any man among the crowd. Even, a man who might feel awkward to approach a woman could shuffle a note into my palm, or better still, find a seat beside me.
Now I was relaxed, maintaining a good posture while crossing my legs and wearing a tender smile. My face took no cover against those who were seated at the farthest end of the hall, nor was the reflection of my smile professing I was unapproachable.
The event unfolded as the guests of honour were summoned to the high table. Dance, chants, applauds and struggle for the complimentary packages soon enslaved the atmosphere. Then my nose caught a smell. The everlasting aroma of the local cuisine was tantalising, but my objective was contrary to satisfying my longing for taste. Everyone had come for a purpose, and I had my strong, unwavering objective.
Gradually, the last agenda on the programme rounded off. It was a remarkable revelation for the couple and their well-wishers, but I was all alone with my unrealised expectations. It was annoying that the only man who sat beside me was mute and actionless like a statue, although he looked more like a bachelor. Time ran out quickly and, to my utmost dismay, no one cared to invite me for even a one-minute conversation.
A deep sigh erupted from my heart while gathering my feet on the worthless marbled floor. Extremely exhausted and hopeless, I wobbled on the street leading to the highway. I was not all alone; there were other attendees trekking along the road in tens. Among the tens were women who seemed to have a similar objective as mine; but unlike me, most of them were apparently not well-to-do.
Many cars moved across the untarred street as they left behind dust flying in the air, and none of the drivers cared to help the pedestrians. That was the reason that raised my eyebrows when a car suddenly stopped beside me. Next, its window wound down and the driver beckoned to me.
“Hello! Hi!”
I stopped and peered in through the window in order to see the bearer of the fist: it was a handsome, innocent-faced man. He was well-shaved and his alluring perfume journeyed to my sense at the speed of light. His look was convincing enough to get me into his car. Besides, his dressing and the complimentary package in his car proved that he was also present at the wedding party. So he had barely finished his invitation when I opened the car door, thrust in my heel and clambered on the seat.
My head lightened up on finding a haven in his car. The cold in the freezing car reminded me of the cars under my carport and the luxury I had abandoned, out of my quest for a marriage mate. Relieving my head on the headrest, his companionship and warmth made a difference because my cars were only air-conditioned, nothing special. His welcoming speech was a remedy to my subconscious state of depression. Now I had a deep sense of relief and a deep sigh was imminent in my heart.
“Thank you, sir,” I said to him.
“Don’t mention.”
The tyres began rolling and our introduction started at a blink in his cosy, scented car. His resounding voice was a power of attraction and his words were an exhibition of an excellent sense of reasoning. Even the blind could perceive he was an epitome of gentility, respect and intelligence. “A bird in the hand” was so lame to describe him; that would only be a deliberate objectification of his qualities. At that moment, I slipped into the hope that he might become the long-awaited gold that would become my crown in the next blue moon.
Now, his mode of driving turning a journey of few minutes to a journey of a thousand miles, he was interrogating me like a criminal before the jury. My eyes gave him a furtive glance, reading him from his right eye to his slightly moustached face. His words were as sweet as honey and the reason behind the depression in the corner of my mouth. Then I began to wonder if such an invaluable man could be single.
As times passed thereafter, I realised he was exactly the man of my dream and yearning. He soon came into my life and got me swept away in love. It was not until I met him that I put aside my ideology about men. I loved him deeply and wanted to share my life with him. My past became a bygone and I was determined to sacrifice everything at my disposal in order to win him. If he could command, I would never question his authority. Squelching my personality and disregarding my worth would stare me in the face. And I would treat him like the pupils of my eyes. He was exactly my choice among all men I had ever met.
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